We love social media in the wedding space for many reasons — planning ideas, inspiration, fashion trends and more. But, as with most things, you can’t always believe everything you read or hear on the internet.
Recently, we came across a TikTok video claiming that the maid of honor is legally and traditionally allowed to tackle anyone that threatens the bride or the wedding. While this does spark a funny “Mean Girls” fight scene visual, the duties of the maid of honor — in the long MOH history — has never traditionally included physical assault.
This sparked two typical LTEC lines of thinking — the etiquette and duties related to the role of the maid of honor and what the actual history of the maid of honor consists of, sans fight club.
The history of the MOH goes back centuries — potentially to biblical times. It turns out that the general idea with a lot of wedding history is that items, people and customs are designed to protect the couple from evil spirits. Bridal attendants used to dress like the bride to confuse evil spirits from finding the her on the Big Day. Attendants would walk closely to the bride all day to ensure uncertainty for the evil spirits or anyone trying to abduct (which happened more often than you’d think) or harm the bride. The MOH would be in this group of women and would additionally act as an assistant to the bride. Additionally, the MOH would be responsible for the monetary portion of the bride’s dowry.
In more recent centuries, the name became more synonymous with an attendant to royalty. This person would be the chief bridesmaid for the day and considered the bride or royal’s “favorite.”
For the modern concept of the maid of honor, the MOH is still the chief bridesmaid that helps the bride the day of the wedding, as well as assisting with the wedding planning and hosting or assisting with the bridal shower.
According to our resident wedding etiquette expert and New Orleans Bride and LTEC editor Melanie Warner Spencer, the maid of honor is responsible for spearheading communication with attendants, supporting the bride as needed, attending wedding dress appointments, planning the bachelorette party or trip and giving a speech during the rehearsal dinner and, or reception.
Though the video made for what we think was supposed to be a satirical and humorous TikTok, it was also an interesting jumping off point for a conversation on the duties of the maid of honor — and bridesmaids. We do not condone, nor is it proper etiquette, to physically take down a guest or threat to the bride and/or groom. We suggest calling the proper authorities if this really might pose as a problem. Hopefully, though, your day will go off without a hitch … or a fight.
